Begin with the Why

Many years ago Stephen Covey wrote the best-selling book, “Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.” In my opinion, it remains one of the best books about personal growth and development. For a number of years, I have given it away as gifts to friends and colleagues.

One of the seven habits is this: “Begin with the end in mind.” In other words, define what you’re working towards before you start.

Know what you want to achieve before you start doing things.

Have a clear sense of how you want the story to end.

On paper, this seems obvious. Before you get in the car, of course you must know where it is you want to go. But in many ways, we often hop in the car, back out of the garage, and then try to figure out as we’re driving where it is we want to go.

This method of driving is not only inefficient but frustrating. It’s more nerve wracking than riding shotgun with your 15-year old behind the wheel.

Enough about driving. What does “beginning with the end in mind” look like in real life?

• In your career, what constitutes success? How will you know if you’ve been successful? What milestones or benchmarks will you use to gauge your progress?
• What kind of retirement would you like to enjoy? What will that require? What do you need to start doing right now to make that future happen? What needs to stop?
• If you’re married, what does a healthy, fulfilling marriage look like? How would it be different than the current state of your marriage? What would it feel like?
• As a parent, how will you know if you’ve raised your children to be mature, responsible adults? Keeping them out of politics and prison is one measure. But it also requires knowing what a mature, responsible adult looks like — how they think and act.

Once the end is defined, the steps to get there usually fall in place. Once I know which store I’m going to, the route becomes much clearer.

I’ve been helping people and organizations get unstuck for nearly 30 years. Whether it’s a one-on-one coaching session or speaking to hundreds at a large conference, I find great satisfaction in helping people reach their God-given potential.